Tuesday, December 18, 2007

I warned them and warned them and warned them.

 
I warned them and warned them and warned them.

Who?

Every one of 'em. I told them what would happen if they got close in Iowa.

What?

That they could expect the worst.

What's the worst?

For, lo, ignorant one. It has been foretold by the brothers Rodham and writ in stone by the forty-second King. It has been anointed with the blood of Hsu and Paul, then sealed and glazed in the fire of the satanic Hillraisers. Those who arise to throw off my yolk and who seek to stop my ascent to the throne shall themselves be destroyed. THEY WILL DROWN IN A SEA OF THREE HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS! THE RED STATES WILL BLEED BLUE BLOOD AND ALL WHO OPPOSE ME SHALL BE MADE TO SUFFER FOR ALL ETERNITY!

Why are you shouting? And why did the sky just turn red for a moment?

Oh, er, uhm, I'm not sure.

Anyhow, I take it that's how you rationalized releasing publicity of Obama's drug use and Edwards' secret love child?

You've got it, Sparky.

With apologies to the Daily Show, circa 2004

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